Crumpet, Victoria Park – Review

Crumpet

8/885 Albany Highway, East Victoria Park
Tel: 08 9355 0901

Open: for breakfast and lunch Tuesday to Sunday

The world as I knew it has now altered.  I am forever changed.

The humble crumpet.  A breakfast food so fantastical that it has always sat high on its own pedestal of morning comfort food.   But that pedestal has now been toppled over in spectacular fashion.

What I believed was a crumpet in this life, is now nothing more than an imposter.  A try hard. A breakfasty has been.  For I have sampled the new world crumpet and it, my breakfast-loving friends, is something to behold.

Ahem.

So, yeah, the home made crumpets at ‘Crumpet’ (Victoria Park) maaaaaaay have impressed me a wee bit.  But what else does Crumpet have to offer? A café can not rely on one heavenly breakfast food alone.  Well where do I begin……..

It was a Saturday. It was early.  It was (surprisingly) busy.  But the breakfast gods were mildly shining on my good friend and I as we nabbed the last table (outside), complete with a delightful view of Albany Highway traffic.  Ahh, nothing like the smell of carbon monoxide in the morning.

Inside, Crumpet is small.  Crumpet also lacks ambience or much in the way of style.  In ways, it resembles an old neighbourhood deli (the previous incarnation perhaps?).

The menu really impressed us, we both struggled to order based on how delicious it all read (see below). Orders are placed at the counter, as is the frustratingly slack norm in Perth.

We were overly hungry and ordered ’Peaches and Cream’ (brioche French toast with marscapone, fresh peaches and strawberry sauce $13.50) with a side of Potato Hash ($3.00) for my friend and Sweet Corn Fritters with Avocado Tomato Salsa and Bacon for me ($14.00, with a side of fried eggs, over easy $4.00).  We split a serving of the famous crumpets ($4.00) and each ordered a coffee ($2.90 – a steal!), with an OJ ($6.00)  just for me.  All of this for just over $50.00, very reasonable indeed!

The coffees arrived quickly and were brilliant.  Smooth, creamy and a drinkable temperature – just the way I like it.

But this is where things started to go a little pear shaped.

After a substantial wait we were given another table’s meals which, although hungrily salivating, we declined.

And then we waited some more.

The weirdos, drunks, and weirdo drunks stumbling by kept us entertained as we waited (and waited) for our food.    It was a good thing the company was enjoyable.

Our crumpets arrived and, even now more than a week later, my dreams are punctuated by these delicious pillows of perfection racing around in my head tormenting me.

The crumpets before me resembled no crumpet which had ever passed my lips, they were a cross between a traditional crumpet, a scone and an English muffin.  I was mesmerised, so much so that I forgot to take a photo of them!  They were hot, fresh and served with butter and honey.  The humble ‘Golden’ crumpet is forever ruined for me. Ruined you hear me?!

And then we waited some more.

Finally our meals arrived and I must say mine was worth the wait.  A few months ago I had tried the corn fritters at Bills in Surry Hills NSW, and I hate to say it but these were better.  The serving size was decent, and the corn fritters were so fresh and went perfectly well with the tomato and avocado salsa.  This could easily have also passed for lunchtime fare, but the bacon brought it back in to breakfast territory and gave the dish the saltiness it required.  I absolutely loved this dish.

My mate’s French toast was thoroughly enjoyed, and I even managed to pilfer a few bites when she declared herself beaten.  Given the menu description of this dish I was anticipating inordinate sweetness, but the sweetness was surprisingly subtle which balanced well with the eggy-ness of the thick cut brioche toast.

The side dish of Potato Hash gave us the food-sweats we were so full, but we soldiered on. Expecting a hash-brown like dish, I was surprised that these were more like a croquette which made a nice change.

So as the heat of the day’s sun started to beat down on us, and the traffic noise began to drown out our conversation, we rolled our full-to-bursting bellies home in a quiet daze, each of us lost in our own crumpety thoughts.

In Summary

The food and coffee is well worth going back for even if the ambience and service is just OK.  It’s pretty poky inside so those with children, prams etc may not be comfortable here.

Service: 6.5 / 10 (self serve, wrong meals brought to table, crumpets arrived way before rest of the meal.  Bloke running the till was nice though).

Ambience: 5/10  (I give it 5 because it had somewhere to sit, and roof and four walls and that’s it really, it may not even deserve 5).

Food: 9/10  (Crumpets!  Enough said.)

Overall: 7/10 (saved by the food)